Saturday was the first day in five weeks that I haven't cried. That's not to say I didn't think about my girl just as much as the day before, but I didn't feel quite so desperately sad. Quite so hopeless. And it was nice. It still feels like someone is stabbing a knife through my heart every time I see someone who is pregnant. I can't help but think, that should be me. But it's not. And hopefully some day it will be but I can't think about that quite yet.